This past Saturday and Sunday were General Conference. I love conference, but sometimes it gets a little tricky to get into the spirit of it and enjoy it with my kids. This year was really good. They did pretty well at playing, coloring, and enjoy being with Mom and Dad. However, this year my favorite part of conference was the Priesthood session. It isn't because we watched it but because I got to play with Tia and Kylee. I got a couple offers from friends to come play during that time, but before I got those offers I had decided that we were going to paint piggies and watch Moana. It was sure tempting to take my friends offers and go chat with them while the kids played. It would have been fun and fine, but I am really glad I didn't because me and my girls needed us time.
Between school and watching Trent and Tori, we really don't get a whole lot of time to be just us and to play. I always feel like we have other people around. That isn't all bad, actually most of the time it is really nice and I think my kids learn a lot from playing with friends and learning how to navigate those situations within the safety of our home. However, it totally crunches my let's go head off and do whatever we want-ness. I could do it with the other kids in tow, but those kids aren't mine and so they don't handle things like my kids do and sometimes I want to be just us. (Disclaimer: Even though I feel this way sometimes, I feel so grateful to watch Trent and Tori. I love that even though our kids spend 25 hours a week together, they still want to spend more time together. I love that Tori and Trent know me, and obey me. They understand our rules and are really good kids. So I am very glad I get to watch them.)
That said it was time for us girls to party. We painted our piggies. We did them festively in Halloween colors and images. Then the three of us curled up on the couch and watched Moana together. We were later joined by our dad. There is just something about all of your family being together and loving that it special. I talk or write about this little girl party we had together and I think what was so special about it? I think what was special is that we all loved it. I loved that when Kylee knew the plan she said, "I want to paint piggies and watch Moana, so I want to stay home." I love that Tia sat still enough for us to do ghosts on her toes. I love that we enjoyed being together. Every now and then I wonder why we don't have more kids, or what exactly the plan was for not having Derek live here on earth. I don't know why, but more importantly I can see how I have been blessed. I have had time to really love and cherish my girls. I have had time to make important decisions about how to help them each with their individual struggles. I have learned to play and love my kids. I feel like a path has been made for me to be the mom I want to be and feel about my kids the way I have always wanted to feel about them. I don't know if any of this makes sense, but I hope it does. I love the time I get with my girls and I love being their mom. Yeah, there are time I make them mad and times they make me go gray, or mad, but I wouldn't want my life with out them. Moments like Saturday night remind me that this--my Tia, Kylee, and Gaupo are my everything and I love them and the moments we get to cherish together.
No comments:
Post a Comment